Wednesday, December 22, 2010

What did I go downstairs for?

I was really proud of myself. I bought all my gifts a whole two weeks ahead of time on Amazon, intending to ship them to Eagle River, where I could pick them up, wrap them, then put them under the tree. It was all planned out. My cleverness amazed me.

On the plane to Alaska I started thinking about how slow the USPS is. I had ordered the gifts 2 days before I left, but I would surely get to Eagle River at least 3 days before they actually arrived. It takes extra long to ship things to Alaska because the USPS is jealous that Alaskans get the PFD. They slow down shipments just to spite the Alaskans. Even though the USPS hates Alaskans, I was not concerned because I ordered the gifts so far in advance.

Sitting in the comfort of my family's black leather couches, listening to my brother playing the guitar, I basked in the glory of how little preparation I had to do before Christmas. Christmas is great, but I usually find myself working really hard getting ready for Christmas by decorating, buying gifts, practicing music, performing music, etc. But this year, I was truly getting to experience the vacation.

Somebody mentioned going shopping the next day, so I had trouble wiping the smirk from my mouth. I thought, my gifts should be here any day. I even got the confirmation email that one of them was shipped the day I left Colorado. Wait, I only got one of those emails, not two. Immediately panicking, I ran over to the computer and pulled up and looked at my previous orders. One undisclosed object had been shipped a few days ago and another undisclosed object was scheduled to ship on September 1st. Yes, the September 1st that occurs in a little over 8 months. This was no good. It must have been some kind of pre-order deal that I couldn't get immediately. I cancelled the order and accepted the fact that I'd have to go find the gift at a store in Anchorage. Oops.

Back in the living room, playing Bach's Prelude to The Well Tempered Clavichord, I started thinking. The music was well-tempered, as the title stuggests, but my mind was in turmoil. Where did I ship that gift that was shipped a few days ago? I don't remember entering my family's address. I was so stressed that I stopped the song on the second to last note, which is just begging for the tonic, if you know what I mean. That second to last note was on it's hands and knees, pleading for conclusion, and I just completely left it hanging because I was so worried that I didn't ship the gift to the right address. Running back to the computer, I pulled up again and noticed something horrible. The package had Denver...and I was in Alaska, which is over 3,000 miles away driving.

There it was before my eyes. The perfect plan had completely gone to waste. All my joy for having thought ahead of time was simply blissful ignorance. Not only would I have to buy one gift, but I'd have to buy two gifts. I'd be able to return the gift that was sent to my house in Denver, but would not get to continue to bask in my perfect Christmas shopping. It really wouldn't be that difficult to ship it to the right address, but I messed it up anyway. In a moment of excitement, I spaced on changing the shipping address.

Here's where I could say, "I can't believe I was so stupid!" But I won't say that. No, not because I'm a positive thinker. Not because I genuinely believe I'm really really smart. But because I already know I'm that stupid. I forget things like that all the time.

A few weeks ago I told a friend I would go to her concert. I really wanted to go and was excited about it, so I mentioned it to her the day before. Whaddayouknow? I forgot it and didn't show up.

When I was a freshman at Mines I was in the band and we had a spring concert in May. Well, I had dinner that night, played some Battlefield, and the next thing you know, I remembered I had a concert that night. It was 9:00 by the time I remembered this and the concert started at 7:00. Yes, I forgot our one and only concert that I had been practicing for for several weeks.

As a teenager I would be upstairs doing something and go downstairs to do something. I would go down there and 80% of the time I would forget what I had gone downstairs for.

I also had a very common habit of putting the milk in the cabinet and the peanut butter in the fridge. I also remember looking for a nice, unbroken plate one day and found it in the trash can where I had put it a few hours prior.

It's a good thing to be spacey sometimes. I'm glad my brain doesn't work perfectly. People who's brains work perfectly annoy me. They read into your vocal stumblings, thinking that you're hiding something from them. If you accidentally say that you're going to the store tomorrow when you really meant you're going in two days, they think that you're being secretive about your shopping. Being spacey is nice when things don't matter that much.

But being spacey is really annoying when people are depending on you. When you're really trying to be responsible and help the people who need you and you just space it, making yourself look like a jerk or a complete fool. This is frustrating. It's also just embarrassing when you forget something and those people with perfect brains just slam you down on the floor with their awesomeness.

My forgetfulness is sometimes funny and sometimes frustrating, but it reminds me that I'm a human living with a bunch of other humans...and a few robots who never make mistakes.

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